If you’re a regular visitor to my blog, you will have noticed that things have been a little quiet lately. There are a few collaborative posts on there, but for over a week, there has been nothing personal, nothing about us. In fact, for the past few weeks, it has been a little bit like that.
Life has been really busy the past few weeks, in a good way. I’ve known all year that June was going to be crazy, and normally I would have been my usual organised self, scheduling posts for the days I where I wouldn’t have time to sit and do anything. The problem is I’ve had a wobble, and a bit of a confidence crisis when it came to my blog and my writing.
I know that I can write good ‘factual’ posts. I can write well about a day out we had or something we have tried. I can write well about what the kids have been up to. Sometimes, though, I want to write something that’s a bit, well, ‘more’. It’s really difficult to explain, but I follow lots of bloggers, and sometimes, I read something that is really beautifully written, and I feel sad because I know I can never write something like that. Does that even make sense? After a good couple of weeks feeling like that, I gave myself a much-needed kick up the arse and realised that it’s pretty daft to think like that. I’m not a particularly deep thinker. I take things at face value and I’m pretty matter of fact about life. I’ll never be able to write deep, beautiful posts because, well, that’s just not who I am as a person. Instead of worrying about what I can’t write, I need to focus and concentrate on what I can do and what I am good at doing.
So, that little crisis over and dealt with, I sat down with my laptop, ready to knock out a few blog posts and get organised. I sat there, and I sat there. And there was nothing. Nada. It’s like my brain has completely emptied. I’ve hit a bit of a blogger’s block before, and it’s lasted a few days before inspiration struck. This time, it is less of a blogger’s block and more of a huge wall. This post is probably really rambling because it is a brain-vomit post, so I’m writing it as it comes into my head! People have said ‘oh it’s fine, take a break from your blog’, but I don’t want to. I want to write. I’m not fed up of it, I’m not bored by it. I just can’t think of anything to write! I’m hoping this will pass very soon – I’m off to BML16 on the weekend and if that doesn’t give me inspiration, I don’t know what will!
I suppose, if anything, this has all come at the right time when I’m so busy that I haven’t really had time to sit and worry about it. We went to an event on the first weekend of June, the second weekend was Harrison’s birthday and party (that’s an idea – I’ll write about that soon!), last weekend I went to a friend’s wedding, and this weekend is BML16. In between that, I’ve been doing lots of overtime at school and going on all the school trips, and I’ve also just taken on a big freelance contract (I’m in the middle of proofreading and editing 50,000 words!). Somewhere, something would have to give, and that’s unfortunately been the blog.
When I’m at BML16 this weekend (that’s the third time I’ve mentioned it in this post – can you tell I’m excited?!) I will actually have some time to myself. I have an hour and half or so on the train to London to kill, and the same on the way back. I’m staying over in a hotel, so I am taking my laptop and making the most of the night and morning to myself, and hopefully will get some work done then.
Anyway, not sure how much sense any of that actually made, and for once I am not going to proofread it – I would probably end up deleting it if I did! But yes, that’s what been happening in the past few weeks!!
Just leaving you with this photo – this is the only photo I have of me with all three boys together!